For my dad

I wanted to share what I wrote about my dad for yesterday's services ...

Yesterday I tried to think of one word that described how I feel about my dad & what he meant to me. I thought of many but couldn’t think of just one that really summed it up. I hope as I put my thoughts on paper it will come to me. I have many childhood memories of my dad but the memories that are most vivid, & most cherished, are from my adult life and the time we spent together. Dad & I didn't often talk about serious things, not in the traditional way. We just spent time together & in our own unspoken ways we said all that needed to be said, I suppose that’s why that time was so special. It was about more than the task at hand. I’ve spent much of my first days without him thinking about the days I was blessed to have with him & how he touched my life. Mom & dad taught me to be an independent person but I always knew they were never more than a phone call away. Mom would ask dad for weeks to do something for her to no avail but all I had to do was call & by the time I said, "Dad, I need" he was already out the door. I suspect that he knew by the time I called him I had already tried it myself & was really in a jam! And I'm enough like mom that he knew when I got something in mind, I wanted it done yesterday. When I bought my first house & the ten years that followed there were a lot of those phone calls. I walked through my house last week & in every room I saw his handprint. Together we remodeled & redecorated every room in that house, from ceiling to floor. He taught me to be a plumber & an electrician - and most importantly, I learned how important clear signals are when communicating about whether the power is on or off! I was the one, by the way, that got the jolt that day! He taught me to be a painter, appliance repairman, lawnmower mechanic, & one late night he even taught me how to stop a truck with its accelerator stuck wide open. There were very few things together we didn't try. And the leaves from my big oak tree ... there were millions of them & many a fall day I called for help when it was more than one person could tackle. I sat in my swing hanging from that big oak tree last week & thought of the ice cream & hot dogs from the Root Beer Stande we've eaten over the years in that very swing after a long day in the yard. His help never cost me more than a cup of coffee or chili dog & a hug. And truly the hug was all he really wanted. Last week I asked dad if he knew what we'd have been doing that week. He grinned & said, "Spring cleaning". Every spring we spent most of my spring break in the yard together cleaning & landscaping. I bet we laid close to 1000 bags of mulch over the last ten years & picked up at least that many sticks each & every spring. He used to laugh at me & how every single stick had to be picked up. I believe I heard more than once that I was just like my mother! The first year after his cancer he wasn’t able to help me physically but I told mom I couldn’t do it without him. I didn't really need his help, I just wanted his company & that time we've always had together. It's time for spring cleaning & I told him I wasn't sure I'd be able to do it this year. He said, "me either". Mom & dad joked over the years about the time before they met as 'before Larry'. You see for me, there is no before Larry. He has been with me since my first breath. I don't know how to live my life without my dad & I have no idea how I will get through my spring yard cleaning this year without his company but I suspect like each day, I'll do it one stick at a time. My dad taught me so much over the years but I think I learned the most from him in the last two years & especially in his last days with us. My dad displayed strength, determination, & courage that you had to see to believe and a love and dedication to family beyond words. I have never witnessed a stronger man or a stronger fight & one done with such grace. As I close this I found my one word for dad. The dictionary defines a hero as a man of distinguished courage or ability, admired for his brave deeds and noble qualities. That’s my dad, my hero. A friend told me she too lost her dad before her son was born but as he's grown she's seen so much of her dad in him & that as I watch our little boy I too will begin to see my dad. I hope & pray that I do, he couldn't be like a finer man.